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2002-07-12 - 1:47 a.m. I have to say: I never thought Eminem was remotely attractive, have never really liked his music (except for a few select songs), and just generally felt he was a jerk. But now, it seems I am being pulled to the dark side, and it's all because of the movie trailer. For some reason, seeing him in a preview (with Britany Murphy, who I adore) as a hardcore thug with a heart made me have a mini-crush on him. I am so pathetic, but I am seeing that movie if I have to see it alone! Okay, now that I have confessed my shameful secret, let me get on with the rest of the entry. We went to eat at Macaroni Grill tonight, and it was sooooo good. I love food. I had a salad that looked similar to the Olive Garden salad, but it was slightly different in taste. I also had the Mama's Trio which consisted of chicken parmesean, lasagna, and canelloni. I know you're jealous. I also have leftovers for lunch tomorrow, which is always the best feeling. We also went to this Rural Life museum, which was pretty cool and educational. The bad part was that it was mainly outdoors and I was sweating like a pig from the heat. (Do pigs really sweat an excessive amount? Just curious.) But it was really interesting and depressing to see all those slave cabins, school houses, churches, and doctor's utensils from back in the day. I like museums as long as they aren't boring. I was a little sad that there was no guided tour, because I always love it when the tour guide tries to be funny (or when they actually are). It's almost time for our road trip, so that will be fun. I also finished How to Be Good and so I'm now reading Good in Bed by Jennifer Weiner. It is one of those single-girl-in-the-city types that I love so much, although I'm not enjoying it as much as I had hoped. It's set in Philly, so there are no cute British things going on, so that might be part of it. I enjoyed American Idol immensely last night, as I'm sure you did. I wanted either A. Peel (I forget if her first name is Amanda or Angela) or RJ to win. I am a sucker for the song "Lately." I feel bad for RJ, though, because he always looks like he's wearing massive amounts of makeup. Maybe he is. Anyway, I am pretty sure that I will be missing next week's one and a half hour extravaganza, since I will be doing more important things, but I will be with the American-idol-wanna-bes in spirit. I don't know who anyone is kidding, Justin is going to win the whole thing, but it's fun to watch anyway. I've been thinking about my lack of exercise/diet-ness this summer. My mom actually lost something like twenty pounds since I last saw her since she is on this crazy fitness kick. So anyway, we were discussing this and I said something about wanting to lose a bit of weight myself. She asked me a good question, "But haven't you stayed the same weight for a really long time now?" Why yes, I have. I went on a diet my senior year of college and lost fifteen pounds, then gained about five back a year later. But other than that I have stayed the same. So anyway, my mom pointing that out made me feel a little bit better. I'm not saying I'm not still going to try to exercise and be healthier in my eating habits, but I think I need to stop agonizing over five-ten pounds. So my new goal, on top of everything else, is to really try to be more realistic and happy with myself. All of the BMI's and weight charts say that I am normal weight for my height. I grew up as a skinny person, so I think this is more about me wanting to be a skinny person again, instead of wanting to be a normal person. And that is just stupid. I shouldn't want to be a skinny person, I should want to be an in-shape person, or a not-overweight person. There is no need for me to be a skinny person. And there is no way I can actually be a skinny person again because I have hips now, which I didn't really have in high school. Hips just don't disappear. Anyway, I'm sick of it. And on that note, it's time for me to go to bed.
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