Las Vegas was a big-time self-esteem boost for me. I had some really nice compliments from my vice principal (actually all three administrators gave me compliments). I also had a random lady walk up to me and tell me, "You don't know me, but I just had to tell you how beautiful you are." Then I had a blackjack dealer card me (I got carded three times, a compliment in itself) and then tell me that I look like a brown-haired Nicole Kidman (everyone at the table agreed). Then I had two bartenders find out I was an eighth grade teacher and they said that I must be causing a lot of wet dreams. Of course, I told them that was VERY INAPPROPRIATE, and my students do not think of me in that way. They were both flirting with me in that kind of inappropriate way for a long time, and gave both me and one of the other teachers free drinks. For free drinks I guess I can handle some disgusting humor. And the cute one called me baby and said he wanted to make out with me, and being called baby is my weakness.
I didn't end up doing anything bad (I thought about it, but didn't), but I did drink far too much. The earliest that we came in was 2 AM, and on the last night me and one of the other teachers stayed out until 8 AM. We did actually go to a lot of sessions of the conference, and we learned a lot and planned our inservice, so it was a mix of fun and work. Anyway, the 8 AM day was out of control, and I should not have taken a tequilla shot, but I survived without throwing up.
This Las Vegas experience was not the same as last year, because last year I got to know one of my best friends. I definitely got to know people better than I did, but I didn't make any new best friends. I like everyone better than I did before, so that is always a plus. I also had some really good conversations with one of the VPs. I think that everyone should get drunk with their administrators (or bosses), because you really get close with them and realize they are human. When we had our debriefing sessions every day we had some really good conversations that helped them know what teachers think, and helped us know what they think. Overall I felt really good about this trip.
I also did a pretty good job not talking about people. I did tell the whole Nathan story because one of my coworkers knew about it and wanted to know what happened, but other than that I really did a pretty good job. I also only talked about one of my teammates and some of my team problems when I was asked about it. So...not too bad. I am trying to work on becoming a more positive person, because no one likes a negative jerk who talks about everyone. Actually, I love people who talk about other people, but I am sure that I am one of the few.
Since I have been back I have hung out with my friend Mandy a few times (we went walking and to Happy Hour). I also saw my friend Ava, who left for California and her first teaching job. I have not seen my boyfriend, Ben. We were supposed to see each other on Friday, but his mom had an emergency where she collapsed and was taken to the hospital. They live about an hour away, so he went down there, and has been there all weekend. Luckily she is okay (something like a kidney stone), and he is coming back tonight. So I finally get to see him. I have really missed him. I hope he still feels the same way about me as I feel about him. I am still so insecure, but I need to stop it. He is an example of someone who is always positive, so I need that to rub off on me.
My cell phone had no service from about midnight last night until 11:30 AM today. I guess T-Mobile had some sort of tower outage. I was outraged that I couldn't get ahold of anyone, and I guess a few people tried to call me. Luckily it is fixed now. I feel so helpless when something like that happens because it is my only phone. I had to call from my mom's house to find out what was going on.
My all-girl's poker night was cancelled at the last minute last night, so that was the second night in a row that my plans were cancelled at the last minute--both due to unforeseen emergencies, but I am BORED OUT OF MY MIND!
I did watch Garden State. It's such a good movie, and it has such a good soundtrack. I also have been reading a really good book, Smashed: Memoirs of a Drunken Girlhood. I can really relate to it. The girl is talking about how young females use alcohol, not because they are alcoholics, but they use it to shield their low self-esteem, blah blah. It's an interesting theory, and I know that I have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. I can go weeks or months without drinking, but when I am drinking I am drinking to get drunk. I am drinking to become a different person, and I am drinking so that I can be the person who I want to be (although the next day I often realize I would rather be the person I am than that person). I am drinking so I can talk without feeling like it's a struggle. I am drinking so I can be flirty and funny and attractive. Ugh. So obviously I have some issues to deal with. Like we didn't all know that already.
One of the people in Las Vegas wanted to fix me up with a local sportscaster who was in Las Vegas for his job. Her husband works for the radio station, and I guess they have wanted to set him up for awhile. I told her I had a boyfriend, but we all still went and met up with him. I couldn't tell if he liked me or not, but he was funny and nice. He wasn't my type, and also voted for Bush in the last election, which is a deal breaker. I tried to think whether or not I would be interested if I didn't have my new boyfriend, but I think I wouldn't have. I thought it was sweet that she and her husband wanted to set me up with him, though. He also paid for our very expensive drinks, which was very nice.
I almost forgot! I finally played Blackjack, and I am no longer intimidated at all. At one point I was up $60.00 on money that was not mine, but I eventually lost it all. One of my coworkers asked me to gamble twenty dollars all on one hand, so he put it down right after I had lost all of my money. We hit blackjack on it! It was so exciting. That's how I was gambling the money that wasn't mine, because he gave me ten dollars of the winnings. Anyway, I love playing, and I only ended up losing about forty dollars, and I played for hours. So that was one of the biggest highlights. The other big highlight was eating dinner at the Aladdin Buffet, which is so, so good. I am not big on buffets, but this is my favorite one.
I'm very excited to see three movies: Dark Water, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and Wedding Crashers. There are a few others I would like to see, too.
Well, I'd better get going. It's so hot today that I'm sitting around in my underwear. That's pretty hot for Portland.
