Yeah, it really is 3:25 AM. I'm on vacation, remember? Warning: this post may contain some petty rambling, so be prepared.
Normally whenever I am around small children I never, ever get that feeling that supposedly most women get. You know, that maternal instinct that whines, "Wow, I want a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaby, tooooooooo!" Actually, I usually find myself questioning whether or not I EVER want to have kids at all. Today when I was hanging out with Lucia and Jeff and their two daughters, I got the whine. I don't know what to think about that.
I've been having a pretty good summer, you know? I have been so busy, but I guess that means that I'm having fun.
I've seen a few pretty good movies in the past week. Pirates of the Carribean was super good (Johnny Depp was my first superstar crush. Before Johnny, I scoffed at the idea of having a celebrity crush. So he holds a special place in my heart. Without Johnny-love there would be no Justin-love. Riiiiiiiiiiiiiight.) It's always been my favorite ride at Disneyland, so there you go. I also saw Swimming Pool which was interesting and creepy. There was also a lot of nudity. I thought it was sort of gratuitous in some places, but my mom seemed to think it was all very natural and non-gratuitous. I can't really decide if I liked the movie, but I enjoyed that the main character was an older female.
The best thing, by far, that I have done in the last week was attend the Liz Phair concert with my sister. She is probably my favorite female singer (the other day Justin asked me if I liked Liz Phair or Aimee Mann better, which was really bizarre--I didn't even think he would remember who Aimee Mann was since I haven't listened to her in quite some time). Anyway, this was one of the best concerts of my life. Obviously, I have not been to many concerts. I've only been to E-Rock (some Christian rapper guy), Pharcyde/Cypress Hill, Puff Daddy and the Family, Last Chance Summer Dance (included Christina Aguilera, Shaggy, Destiny's Child and a few others), Shaggy, Reggae Sunsplash Festival, Quasi, and Justin Timberlake/Christina Aguilera. That's not many. But anyway, I would say that Liz Phair was as good as seeing Shaggy, and he puts on such a great show. Because it was at a small place and was general admission we were able to get as close as we wanted, so we were probably eight feet away from her. She was a lot smaller than I expected her to be (she was tiny!), and she was so good. She sounded just as great live as she does on CD, and she sang all of my favorite songs I wanted her to sing. Except for her newest CD, which I didn't have a chance to buy yet, I know pretty much all of her songs by heart. That's pretty rare for me because I don't listen to most CDs the way that I used to--I hardly ever listen to them over and over and memorize lyrics like I did back in high school. The other great thing was how appreciative she was of the audience and how genuinely happy she seemed to be playing for us. She was so sweet and funny, and I've never seen someone seem so completely happy to be performing. I was having a major crush on her, and I'm not bisexual. I was so glad that I went, and if you like Liz Phair you should definitely see her if she plays near you. She has not "sold out" in my opinion, and I liked her new songs, too.
The other funny thing was that the audience was so varied. There were not, of course, any people who looked like me. I'm like average white girl who wears flip flops, capris, and a poser t-shirt that says, "Hawaii" on it, but it's obviously from the mall. But there were the typical dread-locked white people who smell like pot and who are at every concert (okay, so they weren't at the Justin concert, but they were at every other concert I've ever attended--they seem to enjoy hip-hop, reggae, alternative, and indie rock equally). The weirdest audience members were the random forty-year old guys who seemed to know all of the words and have huge crushes on her. There were only a few teenager types, but there were a lot of people my age who were more "alternative." I seemed to be the only one wearing a color that was not black, white, or olive green. Anyway, it was such a great show and I was so happy I went, and so happy I got to share the experience with my sister.
Besides that, I spent one weekend hanging out with Mark, Elizabeth and Justin. We made apple martinis and lemon drops and were very ridiculous and fun. Even Elizabeth got drunk, and she rarely drinks. The highlight of the trip was when we went out to this insane karaoke bar and there were these girls that were trying to pull the lesbian card for attention. I think you know the girls I am talking about. They are the straight, annoying girls at every club who like to dance all up on each other freak-style. They aren't just girls who like to dance with their friends because they are having fun, they are doing it to try to get male attention because, as everyone knows, guys dig chicks who get it on with each other. Right? WHATEVER. Anyway, these girls were randomly dancing up on each other in front of the karaoke action, even though there wasn't a dance floor there and no one was dancing there. As you may or may not know, I am the biggest snob in the world. Instead of being admired and hit on at clubs for my beauty and fun nature, I am complimented sarcastically by jerky guys for my eye-rolling and the prissy way I carry my purse. Good thing I'm not single. So anyway, I lived up to my snobby nature by making snide comments about these girls. However, when the girls got up to do their karaoke song, Elizabeth drunkenly one-upped me. While the girls sang, dirty-danced, and groped one another on stage, Elizabeth began heckling them unmercifully. She began YELLING at them, saying, "Grab her ass!" "Come on, MAKE OUT!" and my personal favorite, "LICK her!" It was the funniest thing I had ever seen in my life. I was laughing so hard I cried. Elizabeth claimed later that she would have heckled the girls even if she had been sober, but I doubt it.
In other exciting news, we were finally approved for the apartment (my landlord was out of town all last week). I went and put down the money on Tuesday. We also qualified to get the first and last month free if we signed a 12 month lease, so we are doing that, too. It is kind of scary, but really exciting. No matter what happens, I think this is the right step to take.
I'm a little annoyed at my cousin right now though. I hadn't talked to her in awhile, but I know she knew that I was planning on moving in with Justin whether I moved to Portland or not. Anyway, I called her to tell her my good news about my new job and such. So she asked me if I found an apartment yet or what. So I told her, "Oh yeah, we found this really cute apartment right near my school. We really like it and we're moving in in August." So she asks all innocent-like, "Who--you and your mom, or...?" Um. Yeah. I'm 25 years old and I have lived on my own for three years. I'm really going to move in with my mom again. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I laughed and I was like, "Um, no, with Justin. I'm not going to move back in with my mom." She KNEW that when she asked the question, and I KNOW she did not just forget. It was a matter of silently judging, and it really pissed me off. How hypocritical is it for her to judge me for moving in with my boyfriend of EIGHT YEARS? She's made some extremely poor, extremely hypocritical choices for herself, but I haven't judged her for them. If anything, I have tried to make her realize that she's not a bad person for making them. But anyway, I was surprised and annoyed at the crap she pulled on me.
Luckily everyone else has been really supportive of us moving in together. I think some people might be worried that we might kill each other, but everyone seems to think it is the next logical step and will help us figure out if we should be together forever. I wonder sometimes about how other people see us, but more and more I feel really good about our relationship. I know it is not going to be easy or perfect or anything, but I really think that if we want it to work and it is meant to be we will be able to do it. If not, it will be good to find out.
In some ways I am completely ready for this step, and in other ways I am so not ready. I kind of feel like it hasn't really hit me yet.
I found out some more stuff about my new school, and got to see my classroom, but I'm getting way too tired to go into depth about it tonight. Maybe tomorrow.
