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2002-03-14 - 10:26 p.m. Exercise: 30 minutes on Gazelle and 100 leg exercises each leg Bad news: I had Taco Bell for dinner I hate feeling guilty about what I eat, but you know, I eat so much crap that it's sort of important that I start feeling guilty. I had a good day, but I'm glad it was sort of like a Friday for me. I have that textbook meeting tomorrow. The kids are, I think, starting to feel all of my recent absences. It generally makes things chaotic for them and for me when I get back because they are still a little bit in sub mode. I really don't like having to miss so much for this curriculum thing. However, I definitely don't have time to do it outside of school time. I am looking forward to looking through all the textbooks and evaluating them tomorrow. I am a good person to be on this committee because I am very aware of multicultural and gender bias and so I am quick to point it out to others who are not as aware. I helped out with textbook selection before and noticed some very disturbing trends in certain textbooks. For example, I noticed that with the story that was by an African American writer, the suggested activity was to write a rap song. Hello? Rap really had nothing to do with the story, and, while a creative and valid activity, was not paired with any stories by white people. The thing that is also so disheartening about textbook selection is that they really are all the same anyway--almost all of them have the same non-controversial stories in them. They are definitely becoming more multicultural, but most of the stories really aren't dealing with controversial issues. The textbook companies cater to the demands of California and Texas because they're the biggest states, so that explains some of it. It's just really discouraging, but the good news is that books are books, and books are better than no books. I also am glad I get to be involved in helping pick what other things we will get like novels and stuff like that. It's freezing in my house, and it is a big mess, and I am having zero motivation to clean it. No one ever really comes over anyway. I went to Wal-Mart and bought a new CD rack (mine is overflowing) and stuff for an Easter basket to send my mom. I also got Justin an Easter basket as a surprise. His family doesn't really do that for them anymore, which is sad. They stopped doing it when he was little. My mom will probably have an Easter basket for me until I die. I'm glad because I love candy, especially Easter candy. My favorites are Cadbury Eggs, as previously mentioned, and those Hershey's milk chocolate pastel eggs. They look like peanut m&ms but instead they have no peanut in them. They are the best thing ever. Everyone I know loves them and I wish they would sell them year round. I had to buy two bags today for myself as sort of a stocking up thing. They always seem to run out of them at the store. Overall I had a good day. Even when the students are driving me crazy I pretty much adore them. Today I was talking to fifth period as they were "working" on their assignment. They asked me if I vote and I said of course I do. They then asked me who I voted for so I told them to guess. I usually don't tell them stuff like that but I don't see any real harm in it that they know that I voted for Gore. They were asking me why usually older people won't tell who they voted for or if they are Democrats or Republicans. I said that I think it's probably that they are afraid they will have a big influence on them and they want them to make their own decisions. I guess that's why I have not said what I feel in the past. I don't know. I think the majority of teachers are Democrats, but I can't say for sure. Maybe there are a lot of more conservative teachers in the South. I had my lesson for today with the sophomores all ready to go and then I changed it at the last minute. I changed it in the staff meeting this morning to something completely different. I was going to have them do standardized test practice, but somehow I just felt like I couldn't get enthused about that this morning. I think you really have to be in the right mind set. I mean, I think it's a great idea to give them some tips and get them familiar with the format, but I just wasn't feeling it today. So instead we did this legend thing that turned out pretty cool. I don't know what to think about my latest idea about the book I'm reading with the seniors. They HATE it. It's really long and will take us forever to get through. I'm starting to think that we shouldn't read part of the middle section. I could just give them a detailed summary of some chapters that aren't crucial. Then we will be able to finish faster. The only thing is that I'm not sure what to do with them after this book. I had originally thought that I might have time to do Great Expectations after this, but now I don't see that happening. My seniors at this point will not be down with Great Expectations. I could possibly do Frankenstein, but even that is iffy. There aren't really many more things in the lit. book since it stops at 1979, the year the book was published. I can do the Victorians and all that, but I don't have much modern stuff to go with. I could also stop and do non-British lit. However, I don't have any books that aren't British lit. that the kids haven't read in previous years. So I am stuck. Who knows what I will do. I love being at a school that has a class set of books for the seniors, from 1979, and that has no sets of novels that have more than a class set worth (other than the ones ordered this year, the aforementioned ones that I am not wanting to teach). Other schools at least have a big old bookroom with stuff to choose from, but we have barely anything. UGH UGH UGH! How is an English teacher supposed to teach without books to choose from? In any case, I had better get to bed. I, of course, want to watch my cable again before then. I watched a documentary on gays and lesbians in film called The Celloid Closet on the Independent Film Channel tonight. It was pretty good. I saw a clip of it before in a film class, so I knew what it was about. It was really interesting and I would be curious to see what they would have added on to it now. It was made in 1995 so there are a lot of more recent films that deal with those issues better. I was especially interested in the older films that had underlying meanings but never actually said anything. It also made me want to see Caberet and Cat on a Hot Tin Roof again. Those are two of my favorite older movies. It's so weird when you watch an old movie where the main guy is really hot (Paul Newman) but now he's old. I read in US magazine that Britney and Justin are rumored to be broken up! It was the shock of the century for me. I wonder if it's true. I was trying to think of another good match for Britney, but I can't think of anyone. I am kind of hoping she will go out with someone like Craig David. If she goes out with Carson Daily I will die. That guy is the biggest geek and I just feel like he has weird morals. He's supposed to be this big Christian but then he was living with Tara Reid before they broke up? Also, you can tell he gets sick of Backstreet Boys and N'Sync and thinks he's all hard core because he likes Limp Biskit. And he was talking today about how Eminem was all up on the models molesting them last MTV Spring Break like it was some cool thing. Okay? The MTV Spring Break is always the time when I start thinking it's time for me to boycott MTV. I especially hate it because that's what all the teens are watching and you know the girls are getting messed up messages. What really pisses me off about videos is that female singers lately have to be all sexy and cute, while male singers are still respectable if they're ugly. They try to pass R. Kelly off as good looking. I'm sorry, I love R. as much as the next one, but he is not sexy. His ears stick out and his eyes are tiny and squinty, and he is just not cute. I know that I'm probably being a hypocrite because I do love Britney, and she epitomizes the messed up messages that I'm talking about, but oh well. Now I'm just going off and am not even sure if I'm making sense at this point. So I'm going to go watch MTV and ruin my body image even more.
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