|
current |
2002-11-01 - 12:14 a.m. Happy Halloween! As far as I know, I managed to escape eggs on my house for the third year in a row. Yes, they all know where I live. How they know, I don't know, since I didn't have these kids last year. But they know. I was so stingy today and I didn't give out candy. I had every intention of giving out candy. I actually had the huge bags of candy in my shopping cart at Wal-Mart a few days ago. But at the last minute I changed my mind. I don't know why, other than that I am broke. I just didn't feel like spending another $10.00 toward the classroom. My grant for books is just about out, and I'm feeling desperate and bad about that. I think I can get another grant, but trying to find one and all of that is too overwhelming right now. Even teenager's books are expensive, and unfortunately the library sales around here are somewhat lacking. I enjoyed my day for the most part, but I am constantly left wondering why kids won't work on papers in class. They will work on every other kind of work, but when I call it a paper, that they have to do on their own, they won't start it. They always put those off. I don't get it. Oh well. Even brainstorming, unless I give them an extremely structured brainstorming activity, they won't start. Most of them will type when we go to the computer lab, but they won't write in class. I just love my seventh period class. There is one really intelligent girl in there that always seems so interested in everything we read. Another boy, who I have in TWO classes, is also interested. Both ask insightful questions that make me happy. They are also well-behaved, sweet, and generally seem to like me. I have not had any rude children at any times during this class period. I am so happy to end the day with such sweethearts. When I mention the insightful questions, this is pretty significant with the particular kids I have. My students, for the most part, aren't really academic. Some want to get good grades, but many just want to get through a required course. Few really are motivated completely by learning for the sake of learning. I think public education and the way it works is part of this, I'm not saying it is just about them being apathetic teenagers. I guess what I'm saying is that when I see someone raise their hand to ask a question, I get excited. The majority of the time this question ends up being, "What time does this class get out today?" or "Can I go to the bathroom?" or a question that has been covered by me during the last ten minutes that I have been standing before them talking. So when someone asks a question that doesn't do that, or isn't asking just for clarification, but actually has to do with wanting to know more about something we are learning about, it's a big deal. I ate a ton of candy last night, and I will not make that mistake again. My tummy hurt all day because of it. I am talking a lot of candy. Lately my appetite has become out of control. I NEVER eat an entire pint of icecream, and tonight I did. I usually eat half, which is twice the serving size listed, but tonight I ate the whole thing. I am not sure what is going on with me. Maybe I am storing up for winter as if I am a squirrel? It's funny how sometimes you can remember specific things like the first time you learned how to spell a word. I remember writing a haiku poem in fifth grade surrounding that word--squirrel. It certainly isn't spelled how I thought it would be. Another one is separate, because my sophomore teacher made such a huge deal about it being an A in the middle (not an E!!!!), when we were reading A Separate Peace. Tomorrow, if all goes right, I will get my glorious, wonderful, cable Internet!!!!! I can't wait. I also get HBO again. All of this for no more than I am paying right now. It is a miracle. I think it's so funny talking to students from last year. Obviously the ones that talk to me are the ones that like me, but it is so funny how they view me with the rose-colored glasses of retrospect. All of them tell me that I need to teach junior English so they can have me as a teacher again. One girl (who failed my class or got a D last year) told me how my class was so much better because it was easier (I hate it when they say that!) and that the other teacher's assignments were boring and grandma-like, while mine were fun and for teenagers. Well, when they were in my class I didn't hear any cheers of joy when I gave them assignments, and I rarely heard, "That was a fun assignment!" I did hear a lot of, "This is so GAY!" But apparently they were all having such a BLAST last year that the definition of GAY must actually mean HAPPY! I was subbing for another teacher today and one of my current students and one of my former students were talking about my class with me. The current student mentioned the movie we just finished watching, and my former student said, "Yeah, we always watched movies in Ms. Boombastic's class!" HELLO?!?!? I said, "What are you TALKING ABOUT? Where was I? What movies did we watch?!?!" She listed all TWO of the movies we watched last year, but apparently my class last year was a non-stop movie party. Teenagers really are alien-like in so many ways. Sometimes I wonder at the idea that they are really human. They are so literal, yet so full of exaggeration and distortion of facts. They are so self-centered, yet so caring and empathetic towards me the majority of the time. They may be weird, but they are pretty lovable I found a new teaching diary that I'm getting into. Chemteach is anewer female teacher that I like. I'm always a little intimidated by science people, but I am willing to compromise. My cousin, who is getting her PHD in Chemistry mentions that whenever she tells people this they say, "Oh I HATED Chemistry." I guess she and her other Chemistry buddies find this offensive. Number one thing I get? "Oh, I better watch my English around you! HA HA." Blah. I'm starting to feel a bit guilty for all my materialistic values. I've always known this about myself, but lately it's starting to bother me. I have an amazing amount of stuff, including many gadgets that other people are not lucky enough to have. But I am never satisfied; my lust for stuff is always here. What's wrong with me? I'm going to consolidate my loans because people keep calling me and reminding me we are at an all-time low interest rate. My college called last night and asked me to pledge a donation but I told them that I am sorry but am paying back over $50,000 worth of loans on a teacher's salary because of my education there. I'm sorry if I'm not feeling particularly giving, but they weren't particularly giving to me when I went to school there, now were they? I left out that last snippy comment, however, because I save the snippy comments for this place.* *I love the, "You don't have to be snippy about it," quote from Al Gore. I'm sorry, I just do.
|
